International Wouldn’t Fly in the USA, B*llsh*t Main Event
Lex Luger vs. Hacksaw Jim Duggan
Duggan is a Hogan-sub. Not like a gay Monday thing. Bondage. Luger is about to be turned face because the othe affaces uskc. Yeah, I said it. Idiots chant USA. I don’t get it. JR says he wouldn’t mind living inn Sheffield. LIAR. LIES. LIAR. Luger plays goofy heel luger. That sumbit. I feel bad for him having to sell thos punches. Luger’;s stuff is equally crappp. God, it’s a abortion. Your main event leadie and gents. Winz all roiund. Its all MMA and shit. Kiss my bits, boys, you both don’t belong here. One main event is noot like the others. One min event does not belong. Main event chinlogk lasts forever. Oh, more air horn. Guy. Stop it with the horn, ha enough now. DRINKINGING. The missus got me a coffee but I slpp ed a couple turkey in thate. Haha. I win again. It’s a battle of the se c with only one inw. Sres. In at math yoko tun up and kill hak saw. Fuok him ankpne. Forearm. Pin. Hata.ever. PERFECT IS HERE. Thers ou man aevent bitcsles!!!! Power. Wins all around.
(Editors note: Arnold was too drunk at this point to provide a rating for this match)